One Step At A Time

(what's been on my mind lately)

Why is it that when you are in a hurry to go somewhere, that is the time your kids will choose to do something really naughty. This morning was a perfect example:

I was trying to get ready to leave for a brunch at a friends house and I'm literally away from Morgan for five minutes while I do the fastest makeup job ever, when I hear the pantry door being open and shut and the broom being knocked around.

I go to the kitchen to see what little guy is up to and find the brand new bag of potato chips dumped out all over the kitchen floor. Morgan looked like he was trying to redeem himself by swishing the broom around all through the mess. He gives me that look like "I'm helping mom, really I am."

It is so hard for me to not get really mad in those situations. I have to write about it on my blog so that I can laugh about it later. Being a mom requires an endless amount of patience. I seem to be running low on that these days. I think that by having twins, I will be forced to either learn the art of being a more patient person or be totally miserable, and maybe that is a huge lesson I need in my life.

It is always amazing to me when I see mom's who never seem to be rattled or unhinged at the things their kids are doing and manage to handle difficult situations in a calm manner. I always wonder, "do I just have ornery children who take it as their personal responsibility to give me trials, or do I just let all of these little things get to me?" Are the crushed potato chips and the sticky greasy floor worth getting mad over?

Some days it can feel like it is one incident after the other. It can be hard not to let out a negative stream of comments when I step on a glob of toothpaste in my bare feet from the children's bathroom or witness my daughter spill a full glass of chocolate milk all over the kitchen counter and newly mopped floor. Sometimes you just want to look around and say, "Seriously? Did that really just happen?"

I love my kids more than words could say and am thankful to have this opportunity to be a mother and raise these little people into worthwhile outstanding big people someday, but it would be a lie to say it is all sunshine and roses every minute of the live long day. I talked to a woman recently who said she used to have to go out in her backyard and yell at the top of her lungs sometimes to vent a little. She said the neighbors probably thought she was crazy, but at least she didn't end up yelling at her children that way.

I think it's OK to admit that we aren't perfect mom's and we get mad and make mistakes. Even the women around us who seem to have it all together at every moment have their own struggles they deal with. I guess ultimately the long hard lesson that I'm continuing to learn is that it's all about attitude and perspective. We only have so much time to nurture, teach, and tend to our little children before they refuse to let us do it any more. I want to be able to laugh about the spilled milk and crushed potato chips and the globs of toothpaste on my bare feet. (I really do.) I don't want my kids growing up thinking they have the crankiest mom on the planet.

I saw these two quotes the other day and thought they were both worth remembering:

"What is destructive is impatience, haste, expecting too much too fast."
- May Sarton

"Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door."
- Dr. Laura Schlessinger

We often forget that even though we are adults with our own families, we are still continuing to learn and grow. I learn and discover new things about myself, the world, and life in general on a regular basis. That magic switch that is supposed to make you more mature and responsible doesn't get snapped on automatically. I'm still figuring out what I "want to be when I grow up", although ultimately at the end of the day the best answer I can give is -
a good mom.

And that's what I need to keep reminding myself. It helps when I see pictures like this: